Software engineers – and those who take a software class or two undergrad to fill out some distribution requirements – learn about a conceptual tool called a state machine.
State machines come in a few varieties, but the simple version is this: we describe some system (a soda machine that takes coins, a traffic light, a bowl of water) in terms of an initial state, a few other possible states, and transition rules between them.
Let me tell you a story.
A friend of mine who shall remain nameless is an engineer at a financial services company that shall also remain nameless. After complaints to HR about the behavior of the finance and sales bros who constitute the majority of the staff, HR arranged for a diversity educator to come and speak. The contents of the training were so abstract and non-actionable that HR sent out a company-wide apology afterward for wasting the employees’ time. Who benefited, here? Not the employees, who lost several hours out of their day to the modern-day equivalent of a revival-tent meeting. The speaker received a handsome fee for her services, despite their uselessness with respect to their stated purpose. However, the company benefited despite the loss of productivity and the cost of the speaker: they’ve checked off the “diversity training” box on their List of Things That Will Protect Them From a Lawsuit.
Translator’s preface: rephrasing the following into early 21st century English is, to understate things slightly, a challenge. To even explain why it’s a challenge would, likewise be a challenge. How does one explain the polyseme in vocabulary terms that existed in the 21st century? One might as well attempt to translate the 21st century word “internet” into Old English in a way that would be accessible to denizens of a mead hall. Any attempt, including this one, is necessarily flawed.
1357 U.E. (i.e. 3328 C.E., i.e. 3328 AD), Oort Cloud Commensal
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